The pursuit of happyness

Well, it's that time of the year again. Yes, just one more day to the end of 2008. I wanted to do the usual siukai’s year in review but thought that I might make it brief this year.

2008 has been a terrible year, the worst ever. Gys left us suddenly early in the year and the few months that followed was basically hell. I believed all of us close to him were very badly affected and as for myself, it took me a few months before my life could resume to "normal".

But what is normal really? How can my life ever be normal again, knowing that I will never see my dearest buddy again, at least not in this lifetime.

It is almost a year now since Gys left us. It seems like just yesterday when we were having a Christmas Potluck at Kok’s house. That was the last major gathering we had as a gang. I miss you man.

I still remember right after Gys’s passing, I emailed my lecturer informing him that I needed to postpone one of my lab sessions because I was quite distressed over Gys’ death. And you know what his reply was?

He just said, "Okay."

Not even a word of consolation. Nothing.

It’s a sad world out there.

Screw you man! (I just needed to get it out of my system!)

For a while, I was angry with GOD or whoever was in charge up there or down there for taking Gys away from us. I mean, he was such a good guy. Why him? And in such a cruel way? For a while, I lost all my beliefs in religion.

However, I chanced upon a book a few weeks back about a guy whose daughter was brutally murdered and one day he got a chance to meet GOD and ask GOD why he lost his daughter in such a way. Though the book is fiction, it opened up my mind. Maybe where Gys is right now, he is much happier. I mean, this world is a sad place; terrorists attacks, financial crisis, all other kind of crap. What’s there to miss about this world? It’s a fucked up place.

Maybe Gys is living a better life now, free of his illness and maybe he is even attached! Ha. Way to go man! :)

Things happen for a reason and I’m sure Gys wouldn’t want us to be sad anymore. Nothing will ever bring Gys back to this world and we all got to move forward with our life. So Gys, if you are reading this, I know you are. :) I just want to say that you are my best buddy ever and I will miss you always. We will meet again k!

Remember the goals I made during the middle of the year when I said I wanted to score 3As? Well, I did not accomplish it. I scored one A+ though, got close to another A and failed my Maths. Yes, it’s siukai vs Maths again. Am I disappointed? A little cos I thought I could at least get 2 As. As for Maths, I kinda gave up during the middle of the semester.

Yah, I know I mentioned that nothing is impossible, I still strongly believe in that. I’m sure with plenty of time, maybe like a hundred years, I would be able to score an A for my Maths. Ha. But, in the fast pace world of University, time is a luxury. Ha, so I know my limits and thus decided to give up my Maths module.

On the bright side, I no longer have to take Math modules anymore! And that surely deserves 3 loud cheers! Yip yip hooray! :P

Something "amazing" also happened during this semester. One of my tutors accused me of cheating on my tutorial. Apparently, my answers were quite similar to a few others in our tutorial class. This is what he wrote in his email.

RE: Cheat on Tutorial written submission

Folks,

Your written submissions for Tutorial Main Question are all the
same. I am wondering why.

Notice the email heading. Apparently he determined that we cheated on the tutorial already. And notice the email body. Yet, he is wondering why. Hmm… is he stupid or what? Ha.

A few explanations from those involved followed. Most of them were quite nice and humble, addressing my tutor as Sir (my tutor is not a professor, just a graduate student), one even added, "Thank you, very much. & sorry about the misunderstanding." Most of them were simply trying to polish his boots, kiss his ass, hold his balls and trying to get out of the situation.

What about your dear old siukai?

Well, what do you think? I gave him hell of course. Ha.

I wanted my email reply to be short and sweet, so I drafted the following:

RE: Cheat on Tutorial written submission

Screw you!

Lots of love,
Siukai.

But I thought it was missing something, so I came up with another draft:

RE: Cheat on Tutorial written submission

Fuck you!

Sincerely,
siukai

Ha. I wished. The final email looked something much like this:

Hi **,

First of all, I think it's really unfair that you use the word cheat in your subject without first doing any investigation. If you use the word cheat, it means you have already judged us. And this coming at a time when we are all doing our preparations for our exams, it's really very upsetting and disrupting.

I agree with *** and ^%^. If you look at the questions for tutorial, most of the questions are very straight-forward, Each player gets several million "things". So we just replace things with "bytes". It becomes each player gets several million "bytes". It's simply just replacing the word with another word. If that is copying. Wow, maybe I need to get another dictionary. Pardon me for my sarcasm; I'm really quite pissed off at the moment.

I'm really very disappointed that someone would accuse me of cheating on my
tutorial. To think I even gave you good reviews for the student feedback. I
guess I was very wrong about you. If you are convinced that I cheated, then
you can give me zero for this tutorial. Life goes on. No point explaining
further if we are already given the "death" sentence.

If not, I think you owe us an apology.

PS: I can't believe I spent 20 minutes drafting this email trying to explain
something which should be quite straightforward.

siukai

So, did I get the apology I demanded? Well, of course!

Hi, siukai,

You're right about my misusing of the word "cheat". I should not judge
you in that way before listening to your explanation. Sorry about
that.

So far, based on what I have heard from you guys, I cannot tell if you
guys have cheated or not. I will send your submissions to the lecturer
and let him to judge.

Way to go siukai. Just to warn you people not to push siukai around or he will give you hell. Ha.

But, how did this story ended?

His final reply came, (with the unaltered subject, RE: Cheat on Tutorial written submission)

Well, we have decided that no punishment will be imposed.

Regards

When I read that, I got all hot again. His reply implied that he still feels we cheated, just that no punishment will be melted out. It’s like being acquitted but not proven innocent. So, I drafted my reply:

Hi,

I think you should go for English lessons.

Regards,
Siukai.

Ha. It remained a draft though.

For the record, I still got an A+ for this particular tutorial. Ha.

Other things happened throughout the years but my memory seems to be failing me. Ha. So, we shall move on to my resolutions for 2009.

Top on my list: Be Happy. :D. I’m really tired of worrying about this and that and feeling frustrated every time. I just want to be happy. Life is short. It’s really a torture to drag your feet through life and pulling a long face everyday. I want to smile more, laugh more and be HAPPY in 2009.

Number two on my list is to score 5As this semester. Ha. This may seems a bit ridiculous and rather ambitious but hey, you wouldn’t know unless you try. So, why not? :)

Item number three is to pass my IPPT on the 4th RT session and obtain a Silver. Ha, yah siukai has failed his IPPT yet again and is condemned to another 8 weeks of Remedial Training. I have no complaints about that because I did not train at all. Ha. But I have to start training now; I’ve got the whole of 3 months!

Number four on my list is to love my family. We can’t choose which family we are born into. It is fate that we get a chance to be family in this life time, no matter what wrongs or how crappy their behavior, we are still family. And a family should stick together no matter what.

Number four on my list is to love my dar dar MORE. Nowadays, love is not enough, taken inflation into consideration, you need to love MORE. Ha.

Number five is to love my friends. I don’t have much close friends; only the loser gang. So this year, I wanna shower them with more of siukai’s love and crap of course. Ha.

Next is to blog more frequently, at least once a week. I feel that when I’m writing, I feel happy and alive. And it helps to polish up my writing skills. So, what the heck, more siukai crap for you guys! I’ll even throw in new siukai’s stories if time permits. Yeah!

And finally is to eat more healthily. My health has been quite bad in 2008, must be due to the junk food and the lack of exercise. So in 2009, more veggies, more fruits and less meat. Gosh, it’s going to be tough. Just typing about meat is making me hungry. Ha.

This unhappy year is going to end in a day’s time. It’s going to be a brand new year to look forward to. I hope that I can find happyness (purposely spelt like that) in 2009. And I hope you reading this will find yours too. Here’s to a great year ahead!

Happy New Year! :)

Life isn't about finding yourself. It's about creating yourself.

siukai is really sick and tired of his current lifestyle. He is not happy with his current situation and is frustrated that he has lost the feeling of happiness.

And he is determined to set things right in 2009...

Return of the King... of Crap

I pondered long and hard whether I should start blogging again.

My heart said yes but my mind said no. Dun noe why, but recently whenever I have the urge to blog, I will always pause at the login screen. Like now, I have no idea what else to write about and my mind is almost blank.

But I think it's important that I start blogging again. Because when I write, I feel alive! Yah, I think writing nourishes my mind and my soul. Ha. So I told myself, screw your brain siukai! It's time to write crap again.

Yah, and so this story continues...

Siukai will return next week... or even sooner. Watch out for him!

Over the years...

Dar Dar's 19th Birthday - Chocolate Cake

My first ever attempt at baking a cake. Ha. Notice how the chocolate cream reminds you of... Ha. But remember, never judge a cake by its frosting. Despite the looks, dar dar said that the cake was delicious! Ha. It's more of the thoughts that counts!

Dar Dar's 20th Birthday - Mango Crystal Cake

Aha! One year on and this one looks more pro right? Ha. Of course! I took a 3 hours cake-making course that cost me 50 bucks. But judging by the impressed gasps and the "Are you sure you didn't buy this?", it was well worth it!

Dar Dar's 21st Birthday - Mango Fruit Cake

I tell you, I took 2 days to complete this masterpiece and at the end of it, I couldn't move my arms and swore off baking for a couple of months! Ha. But a 21st birthday deserves such a majestic cake, especially since it was for my dar dar! Ha. Luckily we only celebrate our 21st birthday once in our lifetime. :p

Random Mango Cake

Another Mango cake. Compare it with Dar dar's 20th cake. Can see the difference? Become more pro liao right? Ha. Dar dar says it's time I open a mango cake shop.

Christmas Mango Fruit Cake

Sorry, din noe how to bake log cake, therefore baked a mango cake for the Christmas eve gathering instead. It's actually the same as the above mango cake, just added some snowmen to suggest it's a Christmas Cake. Ha.

Dar Dar's 22nd Birthday - Chocolate Mango Cream Cake

Tada! siukai's latest creation! Ha. Compare it with the first choco cake I ever baked. Much nicer right? Ha. This cake is coated with a thick layer of dark chocolate glaze and it is filled with a generous serving of mango cream. Yummy!!!

Look out for more of siukai's cakes! :)

Garfield

Have been following this Garfield comic strip in the Straits Times for the past few days. I think it's absolutely hilarious. Take a look. :)

The day siukai applied for a flat

Hi guys! Long time no see! Yah I know I have not been updating for quite some time.

So siukai, what's up with you for the past few weeks?

Well, let me see... I was busy with assignments, struggling with my Maths Tutorial and just the other day, I applied for a flat with my dar dar. Yup, that's about it.

Wait a minute siukai! U what?!

Yah I know I know, I'm still struggling with my maths. That should not come as such a big surprise right? Ha.

Oh, u were referring to the flat?

Ha. Oh well, what about the flat you wanna know? Everything? Ha.

Oh okay, here goes...

It all started on Sunday when I was online and checking out the HDB website on this new Build to Order project - "Senja Green" at Bukit Panjang. Incidentally, dar dar was online too and she asked me what I was doing.

"Oh nothing dar, me looking at Senja Green, the HDB." I replied.

And then I sent dar dar the link.

"Wah dar, very nice!" dar dar replied a few seconds later.

"Dar, next time we buy 4 room flat?" I asked.

"Yes dar. 4 room. Muacks! Muacks! The place looks good!" dar dar said.

"So dar, how? You wanna apply?" I asked.

"Yes dar!!! Muacks! Muacks!"

Yup, and that was how siukai applied for a flat. Ha. Just like that?

I always thought that I would propose to dar dar in the most romantic fashion ever, like maybe parachuting down during the National Day Parade and with the whole of Singapore watching, pop the question, "Will you marry me?" Ha.

But now that we are applying for a flat together... still need to propose? Ha. Does that mean that the proposal will be an anti-climax? Damn! I just screwed up my marriage proposal! Now I will forever be condemened as one of Singapore's most unromantic guy!

Imagine if one day, someone ask dar dar how I proposed to her. Her reply, "Nah, he didn't. He just asked me whether we wanted to apply for a flat. And he did it online."

Ha. Unbelievable.

Gotta Catch'em All

I managed to download the Gameboy Advance Emulator for my psp. And you know what that means?



It's time to catch'em all!!!

Ahh... the beautiful memories are coming back... Ha.

The story of the lazy birds

This is one of the question from my Maths Tutorial 1:

Ornithologists have determined that some species of birds tend to avoid flights over large bodies of water during daylight hours.

It is believed that more energy is required to fly over water than land because air generally rises over land and falls over water during the day.

A bird with these tendencies is released from an island that is 5 km from the nearest point B on a straight shoreline, flies to a point C on the shoreline, and then flies along the shoreline to its nesting area D.

Assume that the bird instinctively chooses a path that will minimize its energy expenditure.

Points B and D are 13 km apart.

If it takes 1.4 times as much energy to fly over water as land, find the distance between B and C.

Arrggg!!! Stupid lazy birds! Why can't they just fly from point A to B without stopping? That would make life simpler right? No no... they just have to stop midway to take a break and even plot to minimize their energy expenditure. Ha.

My answer to this question? I don't know. Because I was busy trying to shoot the damn birds. Ha.

Back to School!

Hey guys, yup I know I have not been blogging for a week and that is pretty long for siukai's standard. U ppl must have missed me badly right? Ha.

Well, was busy with work and preparing for school reopening next week! It seems so fast; just like that 3 months have passed already. It's already August and 4 more months before the end of 2008.

Oh yah, I reckon that I will be rather busy once school starts, so sad to say there might be lesser posts. But I promise I will try my best to update during my free time! Ha.

Remember the goal I made to score 3 As this sem? Well, I tell u, I think I'm in for a hard time! Ha. I just took a peek at the Maths tutorials and I am already sweating at the first line of tutorial one: "Fill in your name." Ha. :p

NO! SIUKAI, YOU CAN DO IT!!!

Yup, must always be positive. :)

Before I forgot, here's one riddle I saw in an episode of "Friends" last week:

Part I: "What's green and says, I'm a frog?"

I put that as my nick on MSN and got quite a couple of answers. Ha. Fancy a try?

I also came up with Part 2 and 3 to the riddle:

Part II: What's green and says, "I'm a YELLOW frog?"

Part III: What's black and white and says, "I'm a frog?"

Ha. If you think you got the answer, post it on my tag. Sorry, no prize for the correct answer. Oh, alright, I'll give you a limited edition siukai's dairy signed by the great one himself k? Ha.

Dar dar has started her contract teaching already and from the stories she has been telling me about the students, it makes me feel for the teachers. Really, they are doing a very demanding job, especially with the kind of kids nowadays.

It's really a lot of sacrifices on their part, possible danger of high blood pressure, loss of voice, possible over-eating due to stress. The list goes on!

Not everyone can be cut out for a teacher, at least not for me! Even though my temper has been well under controlled since, I don't think I have the patience to deal with these kids, especially the more naughty ones. Ha. I think my first lesson will end up in a WWE (World Wrestling Entertainment) style "Hell in a Cell" match. Ha.

So people, respect teachers for what they are doing. It's a hellish job and they put up with all these kind of crap because they have a passion to nurture and teach. So if you are a parent, do your part in educating your spoilt brat at home. Ha.

Right, you might think I'm doing freelance for MOE. Ha. No, I'm not. :p

K, I got to be going soon liao, got to prepare to bake my famous KC's Muffins for my colleagues. Last day on Friday. Ha. See u soon people.

Everest

There was a super-fit man who wanted to climb Everest. To make his dream a reality, he trained his body to perfection until he was all muscle. He thought this would be enough. It wasn't until he actually found himself on the mountain, at base camp that he realized his stamina fell short of the mark.

His training was good, meticulous even; he could run a fast marathon, lift heavy weights and captain his body and mind through the most excruciating physical workouts.

But what he hadn't prepared for (actually, you can't really prepare for) was the actuality of being on the mountain. Because on the mountain, the air is thin. The lack of air makes breathing - even for the fittest athletes - difficult.

And the higher you go (as in life) the thinner the air gets. This is why on the higher echelons of Everest (and of life) there are very few people.

Now, although this man had been told many times in his preparations that the air on Everest was thin and it would make progress slow and breathing difficult, he never really heeded the advice. Until, that is, on day one when his chest was as tight as a fat kid's school shirt and he couldn't catch his breath.

He complained to his companions, all experienced climbers, that he couldn't breathe properly and they duly advised him (and reminded him) that, when you are on the mountain, this was normal.

"No", he insisted. "You don't understand. I'm a fit man. I am conditioned. I should be able to breathe easier."

Patiently the message was reiterated. "There is very little air on the mountain. The higher you go the less there is. The inability to be able to get your lungs full is normal." Again, he complained. He was fit. Not being able to breathe was not normal to him.

As much as his companions tried to reassure him, he would have none of it. He was convinced that his breathlessness was an early sign of some mysterious mountain illness. He bitched so much that in the end one of the climbers pulled him to one said and said firmly,

"Listen! We're on Everest. It's a high mountain. There is no air. If you want more air, climb a smaller fucking mountain."

And here endeth the lesson.

Every now and then, we need to be told to "stop the bitching and get on with it." On our way to reach higher peaks, we often find ourselves ready to throw in the towel, complaining about the discomfort, the lack of help, the inadequate industry support.

Well, I don't know about you but I don't want to climb small mountains. I want to ascend into the clouds with the legends. And if that means less air, then so be it.

Adapted from "Everything that happens to me is good" by Geoff Thompson

More than meets the eye

Came across these 2 interesting videos on youtube. So I thought I should share it with you guys. :) The videos make you think; sometimes there are more than meets the eye.

Enjoy.

It's always darkest before dawn. But what if dawn never comes?

As I write this, dar dar is in a secondary school beginning her contract teaching. Congratulations dar dar, you have finally fulfill your dream of becoming a teacher. :)

Dar dar told me that since she was young, she had always aspired to be a Maths teacher. She was inspired and motivated by her favorite Maths teacher who was very patient, great at explaining difficult Maths concepts and making sure everybody understood, even the weaker students.

The day dar dar decided that she was going to become a Maths teacher, she worked hard towards her goals, first getting into JC, then into Maths course at NUS and finally now at NIE.

I really admire and envy people who know from the very beginning what the heck they want to do with their lives and go all out to pursue it. As for myself, I'm still unsure where this current road will lead me.

When I was in primary school and we had to write a composition on "My ambitions", my favorite "ambition" was always to be a Scientist. Not that I knew exactly what a scientist does in those days. I mean my compo was very generic. I just wrote that I wanted to invent stuffs to help the world and so forth. Maybe I was "inspired" after watching those sci-fi movies or something. Ha.

A few years later, I wanted to become a wrestler. Ha. You know where that came from don't you? Yah, that's the side effects of watching too much World Wrestling Entertainment. :P

Then there was once I wanted to be a professional soccer player. I mean getting paid to play your favorite sports seemed to be the best job one can get! And the millions and millions of fans cheering you on when you score that winning goal... wow...

More years later, I wanted to be a game designer. And that dream was the longest I had. I held it all the way from secondary school until I completed my National Service.

Then what happened next siukai?

I was introduced to a friend known as "Real Life" and was hit by a dose of "Reality." Suddenly, everything seems so different out there.

I know how I have talked about positive thinking and stuffs but sometimes there are certain times when you just feel like whining a bit. Ha. And this is one such moment.

Frankly speaking, as of now, I really have no idea what the hell I want to do with my life.

It's already July of 2008 now and that means more than half the year has gone by. And well, look where I am now? Did I make any progress? What have I achieved?

Sometimes you work hard and when you hope to see results, you see none. Sometimes when you lament how some people get the easy life while you have to slog and sweat and endure all those crap life throws at you and worse, at the end of the day, you are still at square one.

Sometimes you just ask yourself, when will all this ends? When will you ever see that light at the end of the tunnel? Heck, when will you even get out of the tunnel? Well, how do you even know you are in a tunnel in the first place? Maybe you are in a sealed box - with no way out.

Sometimes you look up into the sky and ask whoever is up there, GOD, ALLAH, LAO MU, JESUS, SHIVA, whatever, whether they are done with you yet. If not, how long more? If not, is that the best they can do?

And you really want to scream at them, "Just bring it." But you are afraid that worse will come because your spirit is tired, your body exhausted.

They always say that it is always darkest before dawn, that once you have endure the darkest moments, good things will come your way. That it was darkness that invented the light.

Right, spare me those crap. I'm too old for that. Ha.

Sometimes you just wonder what if dawn just never comes? Or whether you will be stuck in the darn box forever.

But siukai loves challenges. He has always relish being the underdog. siukai don't believe in GOD, ALLAH, LAO MU, JESUS, SHIVA, whatever. Because he believes he creates his own destiny.

Stuck in a box? Then tear your way out.

Dawn won't come?

Then I jolly well got to create my own dawn.

Moral of the story? Just because life deals you a bad hand doesn't mean that you have to accept it. Fight for your future. Fight your way out of the box. It's never over until you say it's over.

Life never gives up on you until you give up on it.

Wow siukai, that is really one load of bullshit. But hey, it's very good bullshit. Ha. :P

Rude People should be shipped to Africa

Went to Dar dar's commencement ceremony last Thursday. As mentioned in the previous post, it was also our 3 years anniversary! Thus it was a double celebration! Ha.

Surprised dar dar with a bouquet of Sunflower while dar dar also gave me a pleasant surprise when she baked some chocolate cookies for me! Thanks dar dar. Ha.

Normally it's the other way round cos I'm the one who's doing the baking, thus it was really unexpected when dar dar presented me with a tin of freshly made choco cookies. Muacks. :)

As for the commencement ceremony itself, it was kinda boring. Ha. Reminded me of my own graduation ceremony back in the poly days. But this one was more high-class and a very solemn affair.

Everyone was dressed in robes and the professors were seated on stage, facing the audience and there was this pro-chancellor who was like the "King" of the whole ceremony. Ha.

Everything was like so god-damn serious that I was afraid that my breathing would disturb the person sitting next to me. Ha.

And they even banned people from bringing flowers into the hall and the reasons given were that some people might be allergic to flower pollen (This reason I accept) and secondly because some wrappers might be a bit noisy. (That I find it hard to swallow.)

Come on guys! Relax! It's a graduation ceremony! Not some court, parliament or anything like that. It should be a time of celebration right? Ha. :P

But I guess it's the tradition of university graduation; it's kinda like a big deal and thus everything have to be perfect and SERIOUS. Think the national day parade when the parade commander will ask for the President's permission to begin the parade. Ha.

Perfect the ceremony was not because the first glitch occurred right at the start of the presentation. There was this Chinese guy who was the first to collect his scroll and the name that was read out was one of a Malay guy. Unbelievable. And the poor chap reluctantly went on to collect his scroll.

The second disappointing thing about the ceremony was the clapping. This one I can understand because who would continue to clap for someone he/she don't know for the whole ceremony? The same happened during my graduation a few years back. Clapping was almost non-existence unless you are a big award winner or you were very popular.

Fortunately for me then, the guys were there to cheer me on and I swore there were even shouts of "I love you siukai!" Ha.

It's about time we do something about this "clapping problem". Siukai's suggestion? How about we hire part-time clappers? Pay them like $10 an hour and sit them among the crowd and these guys will clap and cheer throughout the whole ceremony. It sure makes the whole event more lively right? Ha.

On a budget? Then how about pre-recorded clappings similar to pre-recorded laughs on those cheap-skate comedy shows. Ha. Any clapping is better than no clapping right?

Seriously, someone should take note of my suggestion. I'm quite confident that it will add to the atmosphere and make the whole event more worthwhile and memorable. After all, if you are the one collecting the scroll, you would want to do so to the company of thunderous applause and even some wolf-whistles right? Ha.

And for an additional price, these professional clappers can even give you a standing ovation. Ha.

One final thing about the ceremony. At the end of it, there were hundred of balloons that were released to the audience. And guess what happened? Everyone started to pop the balloons! I was really shocked by the people's behavior. Was this tradition too? Ha.

Frankly speaking, I had no idea but it was amazing seeing people dressed in suits and ties popping and kicking balloons like there was no tomorrow. Ha. Really an eye opener for me.

Well I still have not gotten to my topic of the day on why rude people should be shipped to Africa. Ha.

This afternoon, I received a phone call from an unknown number. I picked it up and there was this guy on the other line.

"Hello?" I asked politely.

"HELLO?!" the guy shouted.

"Hello? Who are you looking for?" I asked.

"AH CHOO?! AH CHOO?!" the guy continued to shout.

"I think you got the wrong number." I replied.

"Ah CHOO?!"

"I think you got the -"

He hung up the phone.

A few seconds later, he called again.

I picked it up.

"Hello. Who are you looking for?" I asked one more time, in my nicest voice.

"Mei Choo in?" the guy asked.

"There's no Mei Choo here. You got the wrong number."

"No MEI CHOO?"

"No, how did you get this number -"

He hung up.

What the *&%@&#^% is wrong with this guy?! He's really so darn rude! Twice he never bother to say sorry for wasting my time and dialing the wrong number and twice he dare to hung up on me. His mother surely never teach him properly.

Gosh. It was then I suddenly had this thought that all rude people should be shipped to Africa in a FedEx box labeled "Defective" and in their exchange a starving kid from Africa would take their place and get a chance to live a normal life. I'm sure these kids will appreciate life much better and treat their fellow human beings with respect and kindness.

There are three types of people that get on my nerve. Firstly, rude people. Then, lazy people and finally inconsiderate people. Looking back at the commencement ceremony, there was this auntie who was yakking on the phone for a good 30 minutes. Come on lah, your son/daughter might not be the one taking the scroll while you are talking but do show other people respect right?

What if it was your child who was collecting the scroll and there are people who are talking like nobody's business? You would be bothered too right?

Some people really don't know how to think. :(

But the world is just like this. If everyone was so nice and perfect, there wouldn't be war. Everyone would be happy, smiling and laughing. People would be sharing stuffs, greeting each other good morning.

But these only happen in fairy tales. In our world, rude people are still getting on fine with their lives while malnourished kids in Africa wait to die.

However I believe that eventually, their actions will come back to haunt them. This quote by Wayne Dyer, an American motivational speaker describes it perfectly, "How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours."

Right, someone please get me a box. Ha. :P

Happy 3 years Anniversary Dar Dar!

Today is a special day for dar dar and me.

Yes, today is Bring your own bag day. Oops. Sorry that was yesterday! Ha.

Well, as you can read from the title already, today is dar dar and my 3 years anniversary, that's 36 months of togetherness = 156 weeks of blissful union = 1095 days of missing each other = 26280 hours = 1576800 seconds of thinking of each other = one load of mushy crap! Ha.

Sorry, my dar dar gets a kick when she sees numbers. Sometimes I do get a kick too. From my dar dar that is, for my careless mistakes when it comes to solving maths problems. Ha.

I was kiddin about the dar dar kicking me part. Dar dar loves me so much how can she bear to kick me? :P

Oh for goodness sake siukai! Please stop all this mushy stuffs! I can't bear to read on further!

Then don't. Ha. If you think that was bad. You have no idea what you are in for. Ha. Come on! Today is my 3 years anniversary lei. It's only fitting if this entry contains the most mush-iest crap siukai has ever written till date. Ha.

Incredibly, I have been attached for 3 years. Sometimes I still wake up in the middle of the night and wonder whether I am in a dream. I will pinch myself to double confirm. Sometimes I pinch myself so hard but yet I feel no pain. It's only in the morning when I see my brother's bruised arms that I know the reason. Ha.

To think that a few years back, I was still whining and worrying whether I would ever get a girlfriend. But now I got more than I bargain for. I got myself a lao po. Ha. If you cannot bear to read on, it's okay. I understand. This entry is mostly for my dar dar also. Ha.

Of course we all know that getting into a relationship is the easy part. Maintaining one is more difficult. Come to think of it, 3 years is not really that long. I've met people who has been in a relationship for 6 years yet it did not end in a marriage. But there are of course others who do.

Like the overused cliche describes, "It takes two hands to clap." Just like it takes two hands to make a prata. Or it takes two hand to fry hokkien mee. I mean you can try doing it with one hand but it would be quite a feat. Imagine trying to crack an egg and continuing to fry the noodles to prevent them from being burnt. Ha.

3 years of relationship might not be long for some but for a first-timer that's not too bad! Give me a high five! Yeah!

So is siukai a born natural when it comes to relationships? Maybe it's because I read widely and manage to learn something useful about the opposite sex. A highly recommended book is "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus". That's actually the bible for maintaining a relationship.

However if you can't afford the book or you rather spend money to buy Playboy or Maxim, you can always read the alternative, siukai's blog: Men are from Queenstown, Women are from Bukit Panjang Ha. :p

I think one very very important thing that is needed to sustain a relationship is communication.

Yes, you heard me. Communication is the most important thing. A lot of times we guys think we understand what a women is thinking and women thinks they know what guys are thinking. Well, sorry to burst that bubble. Unless you are a mind reader, most of the time we are clueless when it comes to interpreting the opposite sex.

That's why it is very important to let your partner know how you feel about him/her or when something bothers you. Don't keep it to yourself and assume he/she knows. How in the world would he/she knows if you don't tell him/her?!

Most misunderstanding happens because of miscommunication. Don't take the chance. Communicate. If you find it hard to tell him/her to the face, write a letter, like what yours truly does every month. Ha.

Yah, for the past 36 months, I have been dutifully writing a monthly letter to dar dar. Okay I admit I missed about one or two months but I still make it an effort to write some crap. Ha.

Sometimes when I run out of crap, I draw. Ha. With dar dar's permission, here is a glimpse of the comic strip I drew for her for our 33 months anniversary. You need to click on the picture to view it in its full glory.

The Legend of the Dugong

Not that bad lah. I'm not exactly an art student. Ha.

Besides communication, you also need to do reflections on yourself. How have you contributed to the relationship? If there is an argument, what went wrong? Why did he/she reacted that way? Most importantly why did you reacted that way? Always ask questions and try to think from your partner's point of view.

Don't always assume you are right. And especially if you are a guy, sometimes even if you are right and the matter is not that big a deal, you should give in too. Come on, be a gentleman! And for our efforts, girls should also make it a point to acknowledged that the guy has given in not because he was wrong but because he still love you and do not want to continue with the meaningless squabber.

No relationship can ever be without arguments. Sometimes it is these conflicts that make the relationship stronger. Dar dar and me have our fair shares of ups and downs.

No matter how bad an argument is, at the end of the day, always remember why you love him/her in the first place. Find that reason and your heart will soften and your anger will subside.

Well, that's all the advice I can give now. Ha. For more, you can visit my "dating" blog as mentioned above. :)

Incidentally, today is also dar dar's graduation day! Congratulations too dar dar! Muacks! I am so proud of you!

Ha. Double happiness. :) Oh yah, last week I bought a Jacket for dar dar as a 3 years anniversary gift. And guess what, dar dar also bought me one! Ha. Thanks dar dar! Muacks!

Jackets of Love

Happy 3 years Anniversary Dar Dar! We will have more good years ahead! Muacks. Love you lots!!! :D

Dream$ are made of the$e

Hey, it's me again. Think I'm suffering from writer's block or something. Ha. Don't worry though, this happens to me sometimes, nothing too serious. :)

Having a writer's block is like... well... imagine a choked tap. Water just does not flow out as before. Like you know how long it took me to write the above few lines?

2 hours.

Ha. I was kidding. It was actually 1 hour 59 min.

Hey, I feel my crapping powers coming back now! Yeah!

Actually I had a couple of topics to blog about the last couple of days but every time I sat in front of the PC, it's like all my desire to crap just disappeared. Even the mere thought of logging into blogger seems intimidating!

Maybe it's because I'm tired after coming back from work or maybe because my current work is draining me of all my creativity! Ha.

For the curious, I'm currently working as a promoter at this gigantic supermarket, stationed in the electrical department. It's a no-brainer job, maybe that's why I'm becoming dull. Ha.

Anyway, back to today's topic. Kok once mentioned a few weeks back, "Everyone talks about dreams but to fulfill a dream, what do you need? You still need money in the first place."

I think that is very true. Some people dream of becoming their own boss, of setting up their own cafe or something. But at the end of the day, you still need the capital right?

No money, how to set up cafe? Unless your parents are damn rich or something. Even if your parents are damn rich, they still need to fork out the money to pay for the rent, supplies and misc stuffs for the cafe, which brings us back to the point, Money is still crucial if you want to reach that dream of yours.

I think this is the point I finally understood after like 4 years since I completed my National service. Darn kok! You should have told me this earlier! Ha.

Recently, some of my peers and even my cousin who is only a few months older than me have already gotten married or are planning to get engaged. As for me, I'm nowhere near that! I'm still studying for goodness sake!

When I complete my studies in another 2 years time, some of them might even be Daddys! And me? I will just be starting my career!

Why the diff even when we are the same age? How come there are those who already have a successful career while there are those who are still trying to make ends meet?

As I mentioned in my previous posts, what and where we are right now is all based on the decisions we made before.

Straight after my National service 4 years back, I made my first important decision; that was to join Gys and Kok to setup a dough nuts business at the pasar malam. As I have said a few times over, though that venture was not successful, I truly believe that it was a very very valuable experience.

My next very important decision came when I decided that my first real job was to become an IT trainer at a secondary school. It was there that I met my dar dar and we are together since.

I think the universe works in a strange way, everything happens for a reason. You see, if I had not joined the guys in the doughnuts venture, I would never had become an IT trainer because I would have took up another job when I completed my NS.

And if I did not become an IT trainer, I would not have met my dar dar and well things now might be a lot more different.

Everything happens for a reason I guess. Including Gys's death.

When Gys passed on suddenly, I was jolted from my dreams. I realized that we are not invincible and life is so fragile. One moment I was still talking crap at his house on Tuesday and he was gone just like that two days later.

I now appreciate the people around me more, especially my dar dar and my dear buddies because life is just so unpredictable. So, if you are not doing it already, tell your love ones how much you love them every night before you go to bed.

I also begin to see life in a different light; life is too short to be angry or unhappy. Last time, I had quite a bad temper. My dar dar can "vouch" for that. I even threw temper at my IT HOD when I was an IT trainer. It got to such a bad extent that he wanted to fire me.

I could go on about the nasty stuffs I did when I was angry but I am afraid that after reading, you wouldn't want to be my friend anymore. Ha.

Anyway, nowadays I can control my temper so well that I was wondering whether it is still around. Ha. Even dar dar remarked that I have changed a lot since she met me, I mean besides the fact that my tummy seems to be growing forward by an inch every week. Ha.

I finally understand that there is really no point to be angry at someone or something. If someone or something upsets you, go and do something to change it. If you just shout and whine and complain, losing your temper in the process, would you achieve anything? Maybe your blood pressure will increase and you will feel like crap, that's about all.

If you can't do something to change the situation, then change your mindset. It's that simple. Live and let live. To forgive is divine.

Ha. I think the weekends Buddha teaching lessons are doing wonders for me. Just kiddin. :P

Back to the money topic. My financial health is so bad right now that I can barely afford a single table at a wedding dinner. And I'm like what? 26 already this year? Maybe Kingston was right after all. I'm indeed darn old!

Ha. Sorry, just could not resist taking a dig at him. Alright alright, I know, to forgive is divine right? Yah yah, I have already forgiven him, it was just a harmless tease okay? Ha. :P

But well, since we cannot change the past, we'll just have to cherish the present and make full use of lost time. That's why I have been doing all these kind of "sai kang" job for the past few months. Jobs that if given a choice, most people would not want to do.

I've also met a lot of different people from all walks of life. Like there was this auntie who told me that she was earning $3.50 an hour. I was shocked and stunned when I heard that. It's really exploitation. It's not ethical for me to reveal the place she works at. But here's a clue. "Yah coffee".

You guys are so smart, shouldn't be too difficult to guess right?

Doing these kind of "sai kang" jobs have also made me more determined to help these poor people. Some of these people are really stuck in the poverty cycle. Because they are not educated, they simply cannot find a way out and most of them are too old. Not because they do not want to upgrade but simply because they don't have the means or are clueless how to go about doing it.

That's why they stayed on to earn a miserable $3.50 an hour.

Sometimes when I see old folks going around selling tissue papers or uncles playing an instrument along busy orchard road, I wished I could just give them $50 and tell them to take a break for the day.

$50 might be small change for a rich person but for some people, it can last them for a month (before inflation) or one to two weeks. (after inflation).

That's why I swear that I have to be very rich and give a helping hand to those deserving people, starting from my parents and relatives. I think the moment you realize you have reached another stage in life is when you start to think about others and not only about yourself. Sadly, there are people who never get pass the "It's all about me" stage.

There are a lot of things I would like to do and a lot of people I would like to help and a couple of dreams I would like to fulfill. But like what Kok said, it all starts with money. Without money, you cannot do anything no matter how much you desire to do it.

That's why I have made up my mind that I will work very very hard for the next few years and build up a successful career. Pay off my debts, save money for marriage and give back to society. Hmm... I'm starting to sound like a potential MP. Ha. Vote for siukai? Ha.

Was watching Spiderman 2 on Sunday and this particular quote struck me. Spidey said this to Dr Oct towards the end of the movie during their final showdown:

"Sometimes... to do what's right... we must be steady... and give up the things we desire the most... even our dreams."

Of course Spidey was also talking about himself because he had decided to give up leading a normal life and getting married with Mary Jane but instead choose to become a hero to protect his city.

Well, siukai like spidey is just so selfless. Ha.

A final note on money, It's good to save money for the future but there are times when if you can afford it, you should spend it, especially on special occasions like anniversary or birthdays.

Which brings me to this other quote I would like to share, "What's the use of saving it all for later. When money cannot buy back the experiences you lost along the way?"

I'm almost at the end of my blog entry now. Pardon for the disorganization of the topics, this tap is still a bit clogged up. Ha.

Anyway, remember life is too short to be sad. Smile and be happy. Hope you will have a nice rest of the day! Take care! :)

The Banker and the Fisherman

Hi there! My creative juices are not really flowing at the moment and...

Ha. You see, I don't even know how to complete that sentence. I think I need a break! :D

Well, for today's post, I'll share with you guys this story which Kok sent me via email. It's a nice read. Hope you all enjoy it. :)

The Banker and the Fisherman

An investment banker was at the pier of a small coastal village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow fin tuna. The banker complimented the fisherman on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them.

The fisherman replied, "Only a little while."

The banker then asked, "Why didn't you stay out longer and catch more fish?"

The fisherman said, "With this I have more than enough to support my family's needs."

The banker then asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?"

The fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, go for walks with my wife, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my friends. As you can see, I have a full and busy life."

The banker scoffed, "I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing; and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat! With the proceeds from the bigger boat you could buy several boats.

Eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling your catch to
a middleman you would sell directly to the processor, eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing and distribution. You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to the capital city. After that, who knows, maybe you could take on the world!"

The fisherman asked, "But, how long will this all take?"

To which the banker replied, "I'd say about 15 to 20 years."

"But what then?" asked the fisherman.

The Banker laughed and said, "That's the best part! When the time is right, you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich, you would make millions."

"Millions?...Then what?" the fisherman continued prodding.

The banker said, "Then you would retire. Move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, go for romantic walks with your wife, and in the evenings you could sip wine, play guitar and sing songs with your friends!"

To which the fisherman mused, "Now isn't that strange? Isn't that what I'm doing now?"

Hmm... something for you to think about eh? Makes you wonder why you are in the rat-race in the first place...

Stop bringing your own bags and give our kids their childhood back.

I hate BYOB day. That's "Bring your Own Bag Day" for you. I think we should scrap it altogether. Not that I'm not a green person, in fact I'm always in support of saving our dear precious mother earth.

However, BYOB day is another matter. Last time, it used to be the first Wednesday of every month but now it seems that it's BYOB day every Wednesday at NTUC fairprice supermarkets.

Well, I believe in taking all my medicine at one go; either you scrap BYOB day or you totally stop giving out plastic bags, like what IKEA is doing.

You know that sudden realization, when you are carrying a truckload of grocery and getting ready to pay for it at the cashier when you suddenly remember, "Oh shoot! Today is Wednesday! And that means, I have to bring my own bag!"

It is then you wished that you could time travel and instantly jump to Thursday. Or you could jump back to Tuesday and remember that you have to bring your own bag along when you go to the supermarket on Wednesday. Ha.

Gosh, I just realized I sounded so auntie. Fancy complaining about plastic bags and grocery shopping here. Ha.

Speaking about taking all our medicine at one go, like how the GST was raised from 5% to 7% at one shot, I think we should review the PSLE Maths papers now and raise the standard to such heights that only people from a certain country can pass it. Ha. :P

I mean, have you recently taken a look at the stuffs our primary school kids are learning nowadays? I tell you, some of the maths questions have left me scratching my head. Maybe I'm allergic to maths or something since my scalp always itches whenever I look at algebra or equations. Ha.

Not only Maths, even the science. People, these kids are studying animal reproduction in primary school already! The last time I was in primary school, I was still trying to figure out which came first, the chicken or the egg! Ha.

Even the English, the vocabulary these kids are exposed to and expected to know might even put some of you to shame. For crying out loud, you guys are reading this piece of crap right now while those genius kids are happily easily devouring the Straits Times and some even the Business Times. Ha.

My point in all this? Give our kids a break! Give them their childhood back! I shudder when I hear and read reports from parents that almost all kids nowadays have tuition because every other kid is having it.

I know I should not be going against the tuition era since my patapon dar dar is after all a tuition teacher and the food she brings to the table are all bought from the money she makes from tuition and boy are those nice food and I sure don't want to miss those food... oops, sorry I got distracted! Ha.

But I feel that everything should always be done in moderation. Some kids have tuition from Monday to Sunday, giving them no time to do the most important thing a kid should do. It starts with "P."

No, NOT taking Piano lessons but rather PLAY!

Kids need to play just like how fishes need to swim. I mean a fish won't be a fish if it didn't swim just like how a kid won't be a kid if he/she doesn't play! Ha. It might seems like a strange analogy but you get the point right?

A fish that doesn't swim is either a dead fish or simply a fish that has not been taught how to swim. And we all know what happens to fishes that can't swim, they all end up dead eventually.

A kid who doesn't play? Then where the hell is his imagination going to come from? What about his make-believe conversation with his imaginary friend, or his Steven Spielberg's talents when he directs his Spiderman action figure in his own version of Spiderman 4?

Wow, I just realized how much I missed those. Ha.

For the girls, no more imaginary tea parties or the pretending to be a cook games. No more, gasp, Barbie dolls and Ken. You know what that means people? It means that the entire toy industry could go down! Think of the repercussions!

Millions will be out of jobs. Factories that once churn out Barbie dolls could end up producing "How to ace your maths in 10 days!" instead! That is horrible! Ha.

So people, for the sake of the toy industry and our economy, stop giving the kids so much tuition! I mean, the only tuition I had was from Primary 3 to 6 and even that was a relaxing group tuition where we will spend 10 minutes to do our worksheet and the next hour playing block catching. Ha. Shh... don't tell my mum that.

What? You don't know what is block catching? I really pity you. Ha.

I had minimal tuition and look where that got me today?

...

Right, that wasn't such a great example. Let's move on shall we? Ha.

Point is, kids can have tuition but some time should be allocated to playing. You only have your childhood once and the moment you miss the train to childhood land, you miss it.

There's no second train or anything like that. You can't possibly have make-believe conversation with your Batman action figure when you are an adult, unless you are really directing the next Batman blockbuster and you need to do that to get inspiration. Ha.

Otherwise, sorry. The trip to childhood land is one way and they don't wait for late-comers.

That's why I have been trying to get this point to my dar dar about the future plans for our kids. Tuitions are allowed on Monday to Friday and half a day Saturday. After that, it's playtime and Sunday is family day! Ha.

What? You wished you were my kid? Ha.

But I'm still trying to get dar dar to sign on the dotted line just in case she backs out on our agreement for the kids. Ha. See, siukai is such a nice guy and would make the best father in the world!

Gosh! What the heck is wrong with me today? I'm already starting to talk about fatherhood when I'm not even married?! Ha.

Well, it's never too early to plan isn't it?

I always felt that I was much older than what my IC suggested. Maybe wiser is a more appropriate word. Ha.

In primary school, when the other kids were still catching spiders and grasshoppers, I was already at Tarantulas and crickets. Ha. That was obviously a joke. Point is, I think far ahead. Like currently, I'm thinking of what to have for lunch on Saturday. Ha. :p

Come on siukai! Can't you be serious for a second?

Right.

There. A second.

Ha. I can't be serious. I will bore you to death. The other time I tried to be serious, I was nearly arrested by the authorities for attempted murder by boredom. Ha.

Some of you reading this blog might think that siukai is the crappiest man alive and he is full of bull. Well, the truth is far from that.

My dar dar can attest to that; siukai can be serious and most of the time he is rather boring except when he is blogging. That's when another being seems to take over his mind and fingers and crap will just flow out, like now. Ha.

Okie, I got to stop soon. Need to head to work. Yah, I got another work as a traffic surveyor. Recently, I feel that I'm becoming more of an odd-job worker, all kind of work also do: Software promoter, Membership recruiter and now traffic surveyor. Ha. What's next?

This weekend, dar dar is cooking one of her specialty dish, "Tuna fried rice with sausages". Ha. Looking forward to it. Till then. Au revoir! :D

Siukai's weekend feast and other stories

Hey hey, welcome back!

Wanted to update my blog yesterday but I guess I woke up on the wrong side of the bed (Not literally of course but just felt I needed to clarify since I share the same bedroom with my bro and there is a slight possibility that I might in fact roll over to his side of the bed in the middle of the night. Ha.)

Was feeling quite grouchy the entire day and had no mood to write any crap.

But siukai, I thought you say you must learn how to control your emotions and must always think positive thoughts?

Yah, I did say that but remember siukai is still mortal after all and there are times when it is just difficult to practice what you pitch. Ha.

But not to worry though, I'm alright now; nothing a good night sleep and an episode of Friends couldn't fix. Ha.

So, let's begin shall we? First up, the highly anticipated return of siukai's weekends feast! Ha. Yup, it has been a while now since dar dar prepared dinner on a Saturday due to her going for a holiday in Taiwan a few weeks back and my work commitments.

But it was my off day last Saturday and dar dar was eager to feed my ever demanding tummy. Ha. This week, dar dar decided to cook up a Rendang Chicken Feast! :D So, we headed to the nearest NTUC supermarket to purchase the necessary ingredients.

Ingredients

The ingredients are rather simple. They include potatoes, chicken parts and a packet of your favorite Rendang Sauce. :) Dar dar said that the process of cooking the chicken is top secret, so I am not allowed to reveal the details here.

Ha. dar dar did not say that, just that I'm lazy to fill in the details. Ha. :P Just look at the photos can liao lah.

Frying the chicken

Adding the potatoes

Adding the Rendang Sauce

Simmering...

After frying the chicken and potatoes together with the sauce, we need to simmer everything for about 45 minutes.

The Rendang Chicken Feast!

Tada! The Rendang feast is ready to be served! The bowls of soup is Tofu soup. :) Notice the strange fried chicken drumstick that looks different from the rest. It's actually chicken from Long John Silver, leftover from lunch. Ha.

Rating:

Review: Quite a tasty treat! But appearance wise, the dish seems to be lacking some green. :) Dar dar also said that the sauce was not thick enough, maybe we need to get 2 packets of sauce for 1kg of chicken. Nonetheless, it was a commendable effort! Thanks dar dar!

Verdict: Not bad! Can Eat lah!

Alright then, now that we got the food out of the way, let's get down to serious business. Ha.

Seriously? (Pun intended) Serious business at siukai's world? That's a first! Ha.

I think I need to write a disclaimer for the following paragraphs: What you are about to read next is purely written for entertainment purposes. siukai does not mean to insult anybody. :)

After a few weeks of working at roadshows and book fairs, siukai has come up with a list of the different types of customers he encountered during his sales experience. Take a read to see whether you belong to or encountered any of the groups:

(Not in any order and for convenience sake, all the customers are treated as males. )

1) The "Talk to the hand" group:

This group of customers are most commonly encountered. Their methods are crude but effective. The customer simply raise his hand, palms facing the salesperson (akin to a Stop! No Go! gesture) to indicate that he is not interested. No spoken words needed. This "Talk to the hand" sign is surely a front-runner for invention of the century! Ha.

2) The Head-Nodders

This group of customers will simply nod their head irregardless of what you say. They will nod their head, as if in agreement with what you say. While nodding, they will smile at you but continue to walk briskly away. A very curious group since nodding of the head indicate interest yet these people do not stop and listen. Hmm... they must be from another planet. Ha.

3) The Head-Shakers

In direct contrast to the Head-Nodders, we have the Head-Shakers. This group is more easily understood since they will shake their head to indicate that they are not interested in what you have to offer them. Some will still smile at you out of courtesy while some will frown at you, as if you owe them money or something.

4) The Direct-tors

These group of customers are one of my favorites. They get straight to the point and do not beat around the bush. Normally, their first question will be, "Free? Need money?" The moment the sales person explains that there are costs involved, their immediate reaction will be, "Need money ah? No thanks." Straight-forward and no time is wasted.

5) The "I can't see or hear salespeople" group

These group of customers are the rudest. They treat salespeople as if they are invisible. Despite the salesman's best effort to talk to them, these customers simply walk away, no smile, no waving of the hand, no nodding/shaking of the head, nothing. It is as if salespeople are invisible to them. It is very rude. I think their mothers never teach them properly. If you belong to these group, shame on you!!! :(

6) The "I've got a minute to spare" group

This group of customers are the nicest. They have the courtesy to stop and listen to what you have to offer. Some will even have a decent human conversation with you. :) Though not all of them will buy eventually, they will at least treat the salesperson like a fellow human being, with respect that is. Kudos to their parents for teaching them well!

7) The "I'm simply not interested in what you have to offer" group.

This group is the most curious of all. They do not even give the salesperson a chance to explain what he is trying to sell them. They simply show him the hand or say, "Not interested" before the salesperson has a chance to speak. Very curious indeed, what if the salesperson was trying to give them free money? Ha.

8) The Squeezers

This final group of customers pride themselves in being able to get out of "tricky" situations, avoiding salesmen at all cost. They will find a way to squeeze behind the salesman's back, even though there might not be enough space. They will twist and turn their body within the limited walking space just to avoid eye contact with the salesperson.

It is as if the salesperson's gaze can kill or will have a hypnotic effect on them. Ha. But of course the days of the squeezers are numbered. There will come a day when mutation allows salesmen to have eyes on the back of their heads too. Ha. Gross.

Really got to meet a lot of strange and interesting people during the roadshows, I supposed it's better than being coop up in an office. :) So, is siukai considering a sales job for his future career? Nah, don't count on it. Some things are better left to the experts. Ha.

Good day! :D

Hello there! Don't be shocked okie, you are still at Siu Kai's World, just that I've given my blog a brand new look. Ha.

Yup, have been wanting to change the layout of my blog for quite some time, just that I was really busy with work the past few weeks. But I finally sat myself down and tada! Here's the masterpiece. :D

What? You think the previous design is nicer? Ha. I think so too but I feel that the previous design was not really reader-friendly. The words are too small and cramped. And seeing how siukai's posts are getting longer by the day, I thought I should not continue to torture my fans' eyes. Ha.

The design might not be that pretty but it's effective. Ha. I guess that basically sums up siukai's outlook/philosophy on life. I prefer practical and effective things rather than stuffs that look pretty on the surface but is really useless deep down inside.

As the saying goes, "Never judge a book by its cover." siukai says, "Never judge a blog by its skin." And of course, "Never judge a man by his crap." Ha.

And here's more good news for you siukai's fans! siukai's new blog, Men are from Queenstown, Women are from Bukit Panjang is finally up!

Ha. Yah, it was supposed to be a book but no money to publish lah, so blog first. :)

Have already posted some of the stuffs I wrote a few years back, some "tactics" might be a bit outdated but they still make for a good read and laugh of course. Ha.

And the goodies keep on coming! Do watch out for The Chronicles of siukai - The Fatman, the wardrobe and his oversize pants - another upcoming blog to satisfy your SKC addiction. Ha.

Enjoy! :)

I'm sorry but we might need to send you home...

Hi! I'm back! Miss me? Ha.

Come on, I know you do. :D Admit it, you missed siukai's crap don't ya? Still not convinced? Take a look at the following symptoms and check for yourself whether you exhibit these signs:

1) You click on the siukaiworld link (which is already in your favorites list) the moment you log on to the Internet.

2) You are disappointed when you do not see any updates.

3) You click on the refresh button on the browser once in a while, hoping to see updated posts but in vain.

4) You read and re-read previous post just to pacify your urge for new content.

5) Before you disconnect from the Internet, you click on the refresh button one last time.

6) You become frustrated at the lack of updates and feel that something is missing from your life.

Ha! So are you a hardcore siukai fan and suffering from SKC (siukai's crap) withdrawal symptoms? Ha.

Not to worry, Dr siu is in the house to give you your much awaited dose! Ha.

First thing first, actually I was not even away; I did not go for my reservist. Before you pick up that phone to report me for AWOL-ing (Absent without Leave in army lingo), let me explain myself.

Ha. Of course you guys already know that siukai is patriotic and would not think twice to defend his country when the need arises. Think thrice or more maybe. But definitely not twice. Ha.

Anyway, there I was, waking up in the wee hours of Wednesday morning, bags packed and ready for my 10 days in-camp training (ICT). After saying a silent prayer, I put on my army pants and to my surprise, it fitted! A miracle! There is indeed a GOD afterall! Ha. :P

So, in high spirits, I boarded the first train to Choa Chu Kang, then to Bukit Panjang as my army stuffs were at my dar dar's place and Ed was coming over to fetch me. (My army camp was near dar dar's place, that's why I left my army stuffs there.)

Dar dar even bought us breakfast from McDonalds. :) Thanks patapon dar dar! Muacks.

Oh yah, let me sidetrack for a bit. For those who have no idea what patapon means, it's actually this game dar dar and me are currently playing on the psp. It's a rather fun and addictive game. Dar dar is quite addicted to the game, hence the nickname. Ha.

Back to the story... so after saying our I-will-miss-you and goodbyes, Ed and me made our way to the army camp. It has been almost 4 years since we last set foot in the camp and well the feeling... not that great exactly. Ha. It's never nice to go back lah.

After parking his car, we brought our barang barang to the training shed to await for further instructions. Saw a few of our former camp mates who were also there for their first ICT.

The first sign of "trouble" came when the instructors told us to assemble according to our company and sections and this being our first ICT, we had no idea which section we belonged to.

So we went to look for our names on the list. It took a while but eventually Ed found his name, however I still could not find mine. So I proceeded to the clerk and he scanned my NRIC.

"Hmm... this is strange, your name is recorded for this ICT but you don't seem to have any company or section." the clerk said calmly.

"Hmm... how come?" I asked, getting a bit excited.

"Are you still studying?" the lady standing next to the clerk asked. She was the chief clerk.

"Yah, I'm still studying." I replied, heart pounding faster.

"Oh." she said, a look of surprise on her face.

"So, what's wrong?" I asked, a smile was forming.

"Wait a second, let me check again." the chief clerk said and she went through the list one more time, this time more slowly. When she reached the end of the list, she looked up at me and smiled.

"I have to call HQ, maybe you can wait here?" she said.

"Oh okay, what might be wrong?" I asked, the grin on my face getting wider.

"Hmm... I think we might have already posted you out of this unit because you are currently schooling. But I need to double confirm."

"We might need to send you home." she added.

"Oh." I tried very hard not to let my emotions show but deep down inside, I was already jumping for joy.

A few minutes later she came back and the words that came out of her mouth were like the most wonderful melody to my ears.

"Congratulations siukai, you have won a million dollars!!!"

Ha. That wasn't what she said but the effects were similar.

"I'm sorry but I think you have to go home because you have been posted out of the unit and is currently on the holding list." I could not believe my ears and had to asked her to repeat herself.

And when it was all said and done, what choice did I have? I bid farewell to Ed and my former camp mates and made my way slowly out of the camp. I could have ran, just in case they said they made a mistake and wanted me to go back, but my barang barang was just too heavy. Ha.

And that very evening, I went for a buffet dinner with dar dar and family at Seoul Gardens. Wow. What a day! Ha.

Since I did not have any ICT, I went back to work and was quite busy for the past few days, hence the lack of updates.

Oh yah, dar dar cooked chilli chicken on Saturday and it was delicious! Unfortunately, I wasn't able to take any pictures because my sis took the camera with her when she went on a holiday. So, sorry guys, no pictures this time round.

Besides that, nothing much really happened and thus I think this might be one of the shortest post ever. Ha.

You kiddin me siukai? After waiting for one week, this is the best crap you can muster? Give me more!

Ha. Do I hear shouts of encore?

Ha. Okay okay, let me try to dig up some more crap from my arsenal...

Oh, okay, got it. This morning, at the AMK roadshow, I was introducing the benefits of the membership card to an auntie and was telling her how she could purchase movie tickets at a discounted rate when her son asked, "Uncle, where can we buy the tickets?"

That question earned the son a slap on the head from the mother. You would have think the mother told the son, "Don't anyhow call uncle, he's Gor Gor (big brother)"

In my dreams perhaps! Ha. Instead the mother simply said, "Don't interrupt." Ha.

Uncle siu ah uncle siu... Ha. Seriously, this is not the first time someone called me uncle liao lah. I'm kinda used to it though sometimes I still make my way to the toilet to wipe away the mysterious clear liquid that seems to flow uncontrollably from my eyes. Ha.

I think the first time some kid called me uncle was when I was in Poly. I was walking past this car with gys when suddenly this kid who was inside the car started pointing at me and shouted "Uncle! Uncle!"

I was "saun" by gys for the next few days. Ha.

That was the beginning of the Uncle siu's era.

My worst encounter? You might not be able to take it you know. It could either be the funniest or saddest thing you have ever heard. Ha.

There was one time when I was going home when this UNCLE called out to me and he asked, "UNCLE, how to get to the MRT station ah?"

Gosh. An uncle calling me uncle.

I was so upset that I could not eat for days and ended up losing a few kilos. Ha.

I think it was rather dark that day and maybe the lightings casted shadows on my face, making me look much older, or maybe that Uncle was drunk. Yah, must be lah. Ha.

Alright then, I'm done for the day. Not bad lah, still got 1300++ words, got meet the siukai quota liao. Ha. Don't worry, will be back soon enough. Till then!

The secret ingredient is.... nothing!

I think I must be one of the worst salesman ever! Ha. After 7 days at the world book fair, poor uncle Siu did not managed to crack that big fat zero! If there was an award in my company for the most awful sales personnel, I would be a shoo-in for that. Ha.

Eh boss, I really tried quite hard liao lei. There were a few times I did come close but like what Jose Mourinho, the new manager of Inter Milan proclaimed, almost is not good enough.

I almost got a $150 sales, I almost got a $840 sales but almost is nothing. Maybe in the philosophy of a loser almost is great but of course we all know that siukai retired from the greatest loser club ever a couple of years back. Ha. Therefore, it was actually quite a disappointing 7 days for me. :(

I can blame the crowd, blame the organizer of the fair who did not try hard enough to promote the event, blame the customers who did not give me a chance. Maybe these factors do play a part in my disastrous result but remember that winners make sacrifices and not excuses?

Maybe I'm just not cut out to be a salesman. Ha. I was still afraid that my zero streak will continue since I was back at my other promoter job at Tampines mall. 1 hour before I knock off, I was still at zero.

"Die die!" I thought to myself. "Don't tell me I'm going into my 8th day without any sales?" Now I know how a striker feels when he is on a goal drought. Sometimes you just need that one goal to get the momentum back again.

So did siukai get that one goal?

Drum rolls...

Of course lah! Ha. It's uncle siu you are talking about here lei. The never say die, always positive uncle who never backs down despite the colossal amount of rejections. Ha.

I was almost using my level 3 mind control powers I learnt from Prof Xavier and "phys-co-ing" this uncle to buy with my unbelievable sales talk. Ha. And when he said, "Okie, how do I sign up?" I think I was almost in heaven. Ha.

I had to control myself from hugging him and giving him a kiss. Ha. Thank you Mr Rashid! I'm sure you won't regret signing up for this wonderful card!!! :)

Minus the lack of sales, the 7 days at the book fair was quite enjoyable actually. Met a lot of interesting and nice people. :) One of them is Alfred. Ha. He is like the NICEST and the most FUNNY guy there. Ha.

Yup, Alfred called me the other time and he asked me why I did not mention his name in my blog. Well, there it is. Alfred is the BEST guy ever. Ha.

Seriously, Alfred is one of the top salesman among the part-timers. I attribute it to his tactical use of words. Like when I told him I was 26 this year, he replied, "Oh, then you must be the biggest among us."

Notice he used "biggest" rather than the now taboo "O" word at siukai's world. Ha. His sweet talking must have won him a lot of customers.

Well, just in case you do meet other people who are much older than you, siukai has some wonderful words which you may use. Like you can say, "Oh, you are 26, how I wish I was as mature as you!" Or "26 huh, you must be very wise..." Or simply, "I like the number 26." Ha.

Now you see how powerful words are? And why it is always so important to use positive words? Let's try this experiment. Read the following short paragraph:

It's such a horrible day! The weather was so freaking hot and I waited like 20 minutes for the stupid train to arrive and worst of all it was so god-damn packed that I could hardly breathe. Stupid!

How did you feel when you read that? You felt crappy right? Now take a look at the other paragraph:

Bon jour! That's good day in French for you. :) Ha. It was a perfect weather today, alright I admit it was a bit hot but I could do with a tan seeing how my patapon dar dar has been commenting that I look like a bai zhan ji (White chicken). Ha.

The train today was a bit slow but thankfully I had my best friend, the MP3 player with me. :) Mr Digo is his name. Yup, I name all my stuffs like my mouse is called Miss Mousie while my handphone is Le Nokia. Ha. I just made all that up. Ha.

Well, you see the great difference? One is so full of negative energy while the other makes you feel happy when reading it right? That's why you must always be positive and use positive words. Remember that energy and mood is infectious.

Instead of being affected by the moods of others, why not be the one who sets the mood and pass on the good energy! Smile! Be Happy! Life is too short to be sad!!!

Ha. You suddenly feel very energetic now don't you? Ha.

Kok once commented that my writing was so powerful that if I wrote that I saw a Panda on Orchard road, you would have believed me.

Ha. Actually, he did not say that. I just made that up. But for a moment, you thought it was real right? Ha.

Talking about Panda, I went to watch Kungfu Panda with patapon dar dar last Friday. It's very NICE!!! Very funny! Must watch!

**SPOILER ALERT**

The moral of the story, "The secret ingredient is nothing." All it takes is for you to believe in yourself, then you will be able to achieve what you want."

Everyone in the world can don't believe in you, but as long as you constantly believe in yourself, you are good to go. :) Remember, the moment your dreams die, you are as good as dead.

Here's another great quote I picked up from a book, "Some people die at twenty-five, and aren't buried until they're seventy-five." Cheem ah? Ha.

** End of SPOILER ALERT**

The panda died in the movie. Oops!

Ha. Just kiddn lah.

After watching Kungfu Panda, I suddenly wanted to learn Kungfu, just like how I got this sudden impulse to learn Muay Thai after I watched Chocolate (See previous previous posts). Ha.

After watching movies, I always want to learn/do something new. Like Ratatouille, I was inspired to learn cooking. Speed. I wanted to be a bus driver. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory: I wanted to eat lots of chocolate. Ha.

Oh yah, I just remembered, pre-orders of my latest book "Men are from Queenstown. Women are from Bukit Panjang" has just started. Get yours before it is too late! Ha. Order now and you will get this chance for an instant lucky dip! Ha.

I also realized that newly converted fans of siukai might find some of the stories here hard to following seeing how siukai has almost blogged for 7 years now, in fact even before the word blog was even invented. Ha.

Thus, there's a lot of back-story involved. Not to worry though, look out for the limited hardcopy edition book which will fill you in on the past 7 years of siukai crap. The book, "The Chronicles of siukai. The fatman, the wardrobe and his oversize pants." will be available at all major bookstores at the end of the year. Ha.

I also met this maths whiz kid at the bookfair. Okay, he was not exactly a whiz kid, but his maths standard was still good enough to impress me. I think he's in primary 2. I asked him, "How's your maths?" and he replied calmly, "Good."

So I popped in this Tough Maths CD-Rom for him to try. He tried a few questions and got all of them correctly (some of the questions were so cheem that I din even noe how to solve!) Then, I asked him to explain how he managed to come up with the solutions.

He pointed to some diagrams he drew on this rough paper I gave him and muttered, "This one is 15 then you add this one and that one..." I think he lost me at "this one is 15". Ha.

Nowadays kids are really getting smarter and smarter. Maybe it's because of the cartoon they watched?

Have you heard of Clifford the Big Red Dog? If you have not, welcome to my world uncle/auntie! Ha.

Apparently, Clifford is this red in color dog that is quite popular with kids nowadays. Well, I have no idea until I saw him at the world book fair! Ha. And when I was told that the dog was actually quite famous, I was dumbfounded.

I've heard of Barney, Pikachu, Mickey Mouse. But Clifford? The only dog I know is Pluto from the Mickey Mouse gang. Ha. A case of generation gap already? Ha.

Anyway, I think that Clifford is god-darn scary. Why is it even red in the first place? Ha. Just take a look at the picture I found on the web, below.

Clifford the scary red dog

Look at those scary big eyes and the gigantic paws. Ha. One K2 boy even cried when he saw Clifford. I think he will have nightmares of red dogs for a few consecutive nights!

I swore I had goose bumps when the giant Clifford Mascot brushed past me. Ha. Scary!

Well, this should be my last post until the weekend since I'm going for my reservist on Wed. Do look out for the return of siukai's weekend feast; dar dar is cooking lime chilli chicken and rice this Saturday! Yummy yummy! :)

Remember, you must always believe in yourself. The secret ingredient is... nothing!